I have loved and I have lost...

Life definitely hands you a deck of cards when you feel like you can't take anymore. It just seems to be one thing after another. I am bad at comparing things and I like to compare myself to other people, but in reality you can't. My life and problems are different than someone else. You can't say your problems are worse than mine or my problems are worse than yours. Two different people and two different lives. It seems that after the certification ordeal I thought I was in the clear. But with paying for the two test and then having to buy study books, it made my credit card bill go up. Then I needed to replace the fan in my car, and then I needed a cavity filled, then the insurance didn't pay for the whole cavity, and then my boyfriend at the time broke up with me...the week of my certification exam too. I have a certification exam and let's just say not a whole of studying going on during this week because of everything. I am ready for a mountain top and my last post told me I know that I can do it but sometimes I just want to say "WHY GOD WHY?!? You know I can't handle this, you know I am human and I am weak and you know this brings me down." But in reality, God doesn't give me more than I can handle and but I just feel myself breaking down. I feel me getting just a little down about things. I mean God knows what happens because of the choices I have made and I just don't understand things. God knows why my boyfriend suddenly decided to break up with me and God knows who is next in my life and God knows what job I need in December. I just wish sometimes bad things would stop happening. I haven't been able to be ok since August of last year. I just am ready for my mountaintop and I am tired of the valley ( as in Hinds Feet on High Places). I am ready for the Shepherd to carry me to my mountaintop! Life goes on and I will be ok. God will make everything ok and He is there beside me. I have so much to be thankful for and I need to remember that. It is off to bed and time to do last minute review for a certification exam. Here goes nothing!